Sunday, October 12, 2014

5 Things You Can Do Today For A More Elegant Tomorrow

One of the pillars of our womanhood is charm. Although charm comes in many different flavors, elegance is a mark of charm in action. Elegance is often seen as something that comes with ballroom dance lessons or an heiress lifestyle. On the contrary, elegance is easily attainable with small and daily actions.

Before we get any further, let’s get clear on elegance and what it means in our lives today. Elegance is defined many ways but for our own purposes, let’s just focus on one (as provided by Miriam Webster ).


Noun - Dignified gracefulness or restrained beauty of style

Elegance is marked by grace, restraint and simplicity. In my effort to make the world a better place, I really try to hit the refresh button on what seems like the dying art of elegance. Here are a few simple things you can do today for a more elegant tomorrow.

      Buy a calligraphy pen, and use it daily.
We write things regularly, why not write with a special pen. You do not have to run out and take a calligraphy class, everything you need to know is easily accessible on online (with markers  and even brush tips). I find that use of this inexpensivechisel tip pen makes writing fun and beautiful. To begin, you might just stop by your local craft store and ask where the calligraphy markers are, so you can begin easily. Because the felt- tip tops come in different sizes, you will need to find what works for you!

      Declutter your mental and physical space.
Simplicity is key to being elegant. Having a simplified life is harder when your life is messy. Really. Just clean up your room, your office, or your closet and feel the relief of ease in your mind. You will instantly find a sense of clarity. Life begins to be a little easier and that organization will flow into your life, making it easier to get to your dinner parties, meetings, or classes. You suddenly will feel more relaxed and that easily translates into graceful body language. That, my friend, is elegant. If you need inspiration and direction, check out this YouTuber!

Find a great YLBB lipstick
Am I really talking about lipstick and elegance? Yes, ma’am, I am! The way we connect with others tends to come through all kinds of communication. The way we feel with lacquered lips is not altogether different than the way we feel with a fresh manicure. It is different, special. So find a great YLBB (“Your Lips But Better”) lip product color and be mindful of what comes out of that precious pucker. For the biggest lip trend this Fall, check out this lip tutorial. Just remember to make your lip look your own!

Populate your calendar.
Seems like a strange connection, but, the way you plan your day will dictate if you have time to live at a slower and more deliberate pace. When you are rushed and hurried you put off that kind of haphazard body language. Your demeanor will be more hurried and less open to connect with others, have a meaningful 5 minute conversation, or take in the beauty around you. So, take time today to plan out your day tomorrow. Having that plan will allow you to build in time to move simply and gracefully through your day.

Create a stationary station.
Truly, elegance is personified with tangible gratitude and thanks. Writing a short note thanking them for the telephone call, baked goods, or help with homework makes a difference in your life and the life of others. There is something about a piece of stationary you picked out covered in your personal handwriting that creates a statement of elegance. So get started today by creating a small space to display your pens and stationary, so scratching out a quick “thank you” will be more convenient.

Curtsygirls Character Challenge – Being elegant seems like such a far stretch, but at the root of all elegance is grace. Work today on giving yourself,  your friends, and your family the kind of love you would want…even (and especially) if they do not deserve it. Now, THAT, is elegant!

Thursday, October 9, 2014

It's Been A Year / Where have I Been?

It has been a year. 
Wow! A. Year.
I have recently seen a surge in questions surrounding my blog and my evident absence from blogging. It makes me feel great that I was missed, but a little bummed out about being gone. I hate feeling like I let anyone down. So, I wanted to post a few thoughts on being missing in action.

…So where have I been? …
Whew! If I told you, you might get as tired as I do thinking about it. I have been chasing a toddler, primping a pre-teen, training a teenager. I am busy being super-mom, taxi-driver, drama diffuser, Hockey Momma, Kung Fu Mom, makeup/beauty guru, and more.
Although, I have not been posting to my blog, you can still find me on Facebook (look for the CurtsyGirls Page), Twitter (@CurstyGirlCBC) and Instagram (@Curtsygirls). Come see me there and hang out with me daily. I would love to connect with you and share what is happening with my life, my ministry, and hear from you!

…Why haven’t I blogged?…

Clearly, based on my blog history, I have not been blogging. Not because I do not love to write, because I do. Oh, I do! Not because I have lost my passion for working with young women, because I am still working with young women (and their moms), and have absorbed my attention into more coaching and group work. But, I have not blogged because I do not think it was an effective tool for the audience I really want to reach.
During the past year, I have done a lot of writing and coaching in different areas, based on requests for information about single parenthood, toddlers and teens, general beauty and hygiene for young ladies. You name it.
Although I miss blogging, I found that I was not getting much traction, due to a singular stumbling block: most of the young women I work with, and those I would like to work with, rarely read blogs.
Really. Many do not read much outside of school requirements. They have Instagram accounts and Tumblr apps. They tweet and Snapchat, but rarely sit down for 15 minutes, or even 5, to read a blog.
True story. Kinda sad, but true! So I will be modifying my blog and restructuring it to be more geared to Moms, while still having shorter articles for girls that will look and feel a little different. I am uber excited to be changing gears and blogging again!

Have I still been working with young women?
Of Course! That is the short answer.
Long answer, I love it and will never give up. Working with young women and their moms is my calling. Past mothering my own children, it is where I find my "inner yes." 
I feel there is more pressure than ever on young women. I know it and feel the weight of it when I hear my own tween lament about the pressure to perform, to have more followers, play more sports, be an overnight sensation, look like a supermodel, increase their thigh gap, be better/prettier/funnier than the next girl, have more friends, be more popular, and the list goes on. No, really, I cannot make this stuff up. All this junk. More of this junk. All distractions from their ONLY PURPOSE – to be their best self. So, I will write, coach, talk, teach, and whatever else I can to speak to the heart of young women about their gift and purpose, and never give up. If I save one girl, I will have accomplished my calling.

Am I still doing hair and makeup?

I am a makeup junkie and find that somehow it meshes hand-in-hand with my love for all things girlie. It is part of my gift and a special part of my calling. If you can get a girl in a makeup chair for 30 minutes, you get her ear, you get to listen to the beat of her heartsong. Most people really just want to connect; as much as we love our phones, they do not hold a candle to really talking and sharing lives in person. I also love to justify my cosmetic purchases. Come on, this is the no judgment zone, right?
Really? I love hair and makeup for the same reason I love changing furniture around, doing new things with clothes, love to see someone grin ear to ear. I can see the potential in everything, and love to see something – anything – at its greatest potential. I love to see women bloom into the beauties they were meant to be, from the inside out. I think it is an incredible gift and live with excitement that I get to use it.

Do I still teach?
You better believe it! My daughter would say I love to preach, but she will appreciate it one day (I tell myself, and her when she is listening)! I live every day to create and inspire. Sometimes that happens when a young lady asks me what I think of her outfit, sometimes when I get asked to pageant prep, sometimes when a young lady’s mother comes to me with a question on how to talk with her own daughter during a difficult time, it really comes at me during prom season. It comes at me, flying like a rainbow of colors. I just love it! I look forward to any opportunity to share my love, mistakes, and victories, so someone else is saved of the pain of stepping into those traps themselves. I stay open to the teachable moments with my own daughter and anyone else who is looking for an ear, a shoulder, hope, and a hug. I just stay real and humble enough to share the challenges and victories. 
Teaching? Yup. Always.

So come back and visit soon. I will be here, looking forward to seeing you!

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Simply Charming

I want to be charming. Do You?

Let me start here – Do not miss this:

Beautiful women are women with character.

Charming women are women with character.


Yup. I was designed that way – and so were you. We were each designed as women to desire charm and beauty. We want to be lovely and bubbly. We want to be warm and accepted. We each long to be thought of as kind and show-stopping.

The fountain of that charm and beauty comes from God alone as it forms our character. Without it, charm is … deceptive, manipulative, thin, self-serving, and plain old fake.

Proverbs 31:30 - New International Version (NIV)

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Bet you have met that fake chick; friends with her as long as she wants something for you.

What about that other fake chick; smiling at you in the halls of your school, but talking about you behind your back.

That fake chick too; the one that looks at you in the mirror. Likelihood is that we have done some of these things too - maybe worse. I have, so I will speak for myself.

That chick – the one in the mirror, allows us to spend our time and energy working on ourselves and giving others a little grace for being imperfect. Knowing that we have been messed up, and been accepted, loved, and even forgiven by God sure does change the script.

So, let your definition of charm be redefined as we spend time together. Let our expectations of ourselves look a little different…maybe we just get to be loved when we aren’t perfect. Then let that trickle out into your life. Share more smiles and encouragements than criticism. Give more of yourself and stop requiring others to fulfill all of your needs.

Let your charm come naturally. I am excited to share that growth!
The Original CG
Talk to us about charm at

Back to The Beauty Basics

Let me start here – Do not miss this:

Beautiful women are women with character.

Charming women are women with character.


It is, and always will be, my thought that beauty is an outward expression of our relationship with ourselves and an illustration of the way we honor the gift, of our bodies, that God gave us.

Likewise, beauty (or charm) without character will be an epic failure. Period.

I am not making that up; God said it.
Proverbs 31:30 - New International Version (NIV)
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Truth? We all want to be beautiful and charming – and we are HARD WIRED to be that way. Because used the way God designed, once we have a relationship with Him and develop our character, we will want to care for ourselves (Beauty), and we will naturally want to be in healthy relationship with others (Charm).

Beauty includes hygiene, and health.

o   Beauty – This is the way we honor what God gave us. We compliment the color of our eyes, or the waves in our hair. We care about our health. We dress ourselves modestly but beautifully. We adorn ourselves and COMPLIMENT, not COVER UP what we were given.

o   Hygiene – This is a big part of our outward expression. We care for our skin, groom ourselves, and clean our bodies. These are functions of honoring ourselves and taking time to reinforce the care for what we got from God at birth.

o   Health – This is also a function of caring for ourselves by being careful about what we put into our bodies and how well we treat our own physical state. We do this to strengthen ourselves.

Beauty, hygiene, and health are NOT:

o   Contests to see how much makeup we can buy and apply - My blogs, pictures and tutorials are NOT for the purpose of selling you products or making you feel like you don’t have what someone else does. In every case that I can, I will present cost efficient ways to achieve the looks I share with you.

o   Mean ways we can point out what others might be doing differently with their grooming or hygiene. Don’t shave your legs yet? Cool. Not our business. Wax? Also fine with us. I want you to be equipped to make those decisions with your family about what is right for you, in your time. I am here to educate on all different forms of grooming and hygiene, make suggestions, and provide you with shortcuts.

o   Benchmarks about how thin you should be, what size you should be, or how often you should work out. Like walks? Take them. Enjoy the feeling of a good run. Good for you. Work out every day? Your business. Want to mix things up a few days a week? Great. These are your expressions, with yourself, about what is right for you.

Time is my love language and I spend time writing because I genuinely love you – yes, even though I do not know some of you. Why? Because I remember not having the guidance I needed to make good decisions for myself during a tough time in life when I really needed to have some help. I never want any of you to experience that. I am here as a friend and guide. Most of you are lucky to have mothers active in your life (take a moment to thank God and your Mom). I am not looking to replace them, I want to help them too because there can never be enough support and encouragement for women of any age.

Want to REALLY be beautiful? Gloss is great, mascara is nice, but before you put a thing on that pretty face, know WHO you are and WHOSE you are.

Ephesians 2:10 - New Living Translation (NLT)

For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.


The Original CG

Character – What?!?

Let me start here – Do not miss this:

Beautiful women are women with character.

Charming women are women with character.

Proverbs 31:30 - New International Version (NIV)

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Womanhood begins with the ushering in that happens during our formidable years…if you can read this, I am talking to you! The harsh reality is that no woman can be beautiful or charming without a sense of who she is and whose she is – not by what she sees on TV or what she reads in a book…or even what she has been told by family or friends – but by what GOD says about her.

Start here:

John 3:16 –

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Simply put. God loves you – enough to give up his OWN child for you. You are valuable in God’s eyes. You are loved – good and bad. There is nothing you could do to separate yourself from the love of God. Let that soak in. Think about how precious you are next time you even ponder dressing yourself in something that makes you look like less than a daughter of the King. Next time you think about treating someone else poorly think about how God loves them too…as much as he loves you. See if that changes anything.

God made you just like you are. Honor that. Cherish that. Value that.

God wants you to hold on to that love…but also wants you to share it with others. Try that. See how it changes your life and the life of others.

Let that love guide you. Let that love help you make decisions. Let that love help you relate to others.

I love you too,

The Original CG
Share your thoughts with us at

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

"Falling" - Make Memories

What’s up for Fall? You tell us!!

From the time I was twelve years old, my grandparents raised me. They loved me dearly, and by the time I lived with them, they got to show me by pouring into my life. Both my grandmother and grandfather were retired and had more time than most average parents. They gave me every bit of time I wanted…until Fall.
Every Fall my grandfather took my grandmother on a trip. This trip was only theirs. When they were both healthy enough, they travelled to Gatlinburg, TN. From where we lived, in the Sandhills of North Carolina, it was clear that trip was just to be together on a drive while the leaves were changing colors. It was also clear that trip belonged to just them. It was THEIR annual trip.

I love to find new memories and have traditions with my family. Try making some memories of your own with your family. If you can, turn them into annual traditions. Here are some fun seasonal memory-making activities:
-Trip to the pumpkin patch
-Seasonal decorating
-Hallelujah Night (Halloween Alternative) Party (for you and your family…or your friends…or even a block party if you can get your parents to host this event with you and a few other families)
-Pumpkin Pie Baking Contest
-Fall Treasure Hunt

These are just a few ideas, but I bet you can come up with some that are even better!

CurtsyGirls Character Challenge – Quality Time is my “Love Language” but might not be yours. Find out your love language HERE, and learn more about loving others the way they need to be loved!

"Falling" - Feeling Crafty

What’s up for Fall? You tell us!!

You know I love to get crafty! Here are a few things I found that I just LOVED for Fall.

Monogram a Pumpkin – I swear, I would monogram a toothbrush. This cool craft makes monogramming a pumpkin simple using products you can reuse next year!

Good Fall Wreath  – We all love a good wreath for a changing season! Personalize yours with extra items like initials or figurines for Fall!

Paper Pumpkin Craft – I liked this because it shows the basics of making 3-D pumpkins (in a few different sizes for decorating. Make a few and share with neighbors or friends!

CurtsyGirls Character Challenge – While making crafts for the season, do not forget to share your beautiful creations with those who are special to you. Ask Mom or Dad if you can make an extra craft and surprise those special folks in your life (perhaps it is even FOR Mom or Dad!)!